Positive Testing

Thanks to all of you for your positive thoughts and wishes. I had my pregnancy test today and it was also positive! This of course means retesting again in two days to make sure that hormones are going up at the right rate. It also means very little until we see something on the Ultrasound in another two weeks or so. But, it is a start. A quiet "yay" for now with a bigger YAY to come if all looks good on the ultrasound. My "scruffy" little embryos are trying! Now if everyone can focus their energy on thinking about there being just one or at most two babies, please! I will have another update on Thursday!

Knitting Project fininshed while on bed rest

Just thought I would post my completed project for the week. It was a fun knitting project and I hope to use it someday. I got the pattern book for this project on Bainbridge Island at a cute little Yarn Shop call Churchmouse Yarns and Teas. The yarn was on sale and I thought I would just have enough to do the cardigan but apparently, I also had enough to make a hat (barely) and I hybridized the pattern to make the hat in the book (which was just a generic hat) match the cardigan pattern. It kept me busy until late last night and I finished it this AM.

Oh and for those of you not on Facebook where this pic is posted, I have also attached a copy of my new digital piano which will get much use in the coming months I hope!

Guarded Optimism

Okay ladies and gents get out your rosaries, prayer shawls and lucky pennies.

We got the call this AM that the embryos (numbering 8) were looking pretty bad. Last time wasn't a fluke, just how our embryos act when they are in a petrie dish. There were a few that may work. They thought that getting them "in vivo" (in the uterus) may help and they have "seen successful pregnancies from this quality of embryos in the past."

On a grading scale of 1 to 4, 1 is good and 4 is useless, our embryos were 2.5 at best and 4 at the worst. They like to only implant 1's or 2's.
The goal is for there to be 8 cells and only 3 embryos had at least 8 cells.

I wanted to talk to the doctor before I got naked and wasted my time on 2 days of bed rest. He said that the first test tube baby was an embryo that they almost threw away because the quality was so poor. He figured we might as well be aggressive and see what happens.

So, we went and had the embryos put where they belong.

Now I am on bed rest for 48 hours. The transfer of the embryos was MUCH easier than the extraction!

So I am catching up on Battlestar Galatica with my buddy Jason and tomorrow my friend Cathy will stop by to knit for a while. Yay for friends!

Tom is getting mad if I am up for more than 2 minutes. I am only allowed to get up to go to the bathroom, otherwise sitting (but not quite straight up) and lying only. I will be unshowered and sleeping on the couch until Sunday.

We won't know if this worked until the 16th or 17th of September when we have our pregnancy test.

If it doesn't work, the fertility challenge is off and adoption shall begin.

There is still always a chance we can get pregnant on our own. I still have one good tube. Tom's sperms are the best swimmers up that the doctor has seen. We are just caught in a catch 22. The chances of having another tubal pregnancy is pretty high and the method to avoid that complication is not working so well.

So start the good vibes and we will hope that something works out one way or the other....

Yay fertilized eggs!

So just a quick update as I am running on reserve battery power and am too lazy to get up and plug in the computer right now.

The clinic called this AM.

We had 15 follices
13 of those were mature eggs
8 of those fertilized!!

This is one more than last time.

They will see how the embryos look on day 3 AM for the PM transfer. If they have awesome embryos, likely they will just transfer 2, but if they are a little "if"ey (or sensitive as I like to think), they will transfer 3. I am hoping the cells are nice and relaxed. I felt like telling them to take better care of my potential children this time, but refrained. I think asking them to read them bedtime stories and play them Mozart may be a little too much.

I spent the day updating my Ravelry site (knitting site meets way to catalog all of your yarn, patterns, books and fininshed projects) oh how the OCD me loves this site!!!

My keyboard gets here tomorrow. Guess I better vacuum that spot of cat fur that is right where I want to put it!

More on Friday AM/PM for transfer day.

Retrieval

So we had the egg extraction today. This whole cycle has been so much better than the last one. I think it is the knowledge of what is to come. This time I have had no scary or weird dreams. I slept well like my acupuncturist said I would.

We arrived a little late but the office was much busier than the last time (likely because the last time was Memorial Day). They took me back to the room - a different holding area than before - thankfully! The female anesthesiologist came in and reviewed my history. The very able nurse came in and painlessly placed my IV. They wheeled me back to the room before giving the Versed so I remember the room. I helped them get me up in the stirrups and then the oxygen cannula went on and that is all I remember.

I awakened and immediately asked Tom how many follicles they retrieved. He said 15 and that this was the third time I had asked :-) As I slowly awakened from the anesthesia, they came to check on me and give me instructions for the rest of today and Friday - the day of hopeful transfer.

I stopped slurring my words (per Tom all I did initially was talk all slurry) and drank some water and Sprite and they sent me on my way.

I think there is a lot less pain this time than last. I only briefly used the heating pad and I think I could have gone without. I did take some Tylenol but that was more for a headache than anything else.

I have worn my glasses all day which always makes me feel tired (I only ever wear them to walk to bed and my body is well trained to think sleepy thoughts when my glasses are on). I have rested all day. Tom made dinner, vacuumed, cleaned the garage, folded the laundry and will do the dishes tonight after he enforces some sort of bed time.

I plan to relax and not do much for the next couple of days as I have the days off.

More to come on Friday and I hope that things go better and that there are at least embryos to transfer. It will be another couple weeks after that before they let us take a pregnancy test.

Keeping a positive attitude

We are almost ready to take the next step. I had three ultrasounds last week. Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. The growth of the follicles and the hormone levels were a slight bit more gradual than last time. The best guess on Tuesday was that I would have retrieval on Tuesday of this coming week and that is the date that looks like it will be indeed!

We were able to go to the Duck game on Saturday but I had to come back late last night after the game so that I could have an ultrasound early this AM. The follicles are rapidly growing now and the hormones are rising almost exponentially. My doctor says it just shows that the ovaries do what they want to do.

I am tired today though, a combination of elevated estrogen levels, large follicles and oh yeah, I only slept about 5 and a half hours last night.

Since I will have the week off, I have lots of knitting, movies and small projects set up to do. We will see if I can keep myself from going stir crazy!

I will have one more session of acupuncture tomorrow (he works too much).

I have been finding more and more company on this path of IVF. Some have had success and some have found more sadness than they deserve. It is not easy to explain why some couples are able to have babies without even trying and others try an try and spend lots of money and still have no success. It certainly isn't based on merit, or hard work, or ability to care for a child. I will have great appreciation for a baby when we finally have one!

There is a section from Randy Pausch's THE LAST LECTURE where he speaks of walls that you hit as an opportunity to demonstrate how badly you want something. So, I guess I will continue to find ways around the wall. I am thinking happy thoughts tonight as Tom steadies his hand for the big trigger shot to allow the eggs to be released.

I will let you know more in two days. There were about 20 follicles between the two ovaries and we will see how many are available for retrieval.

Have a great week.

Back in the saddle

It has been a couple of months since my last blog. And FINALLY we are back in the cycle and ready to go. We spent the month of July waiting for the cycle off. The date for the next cycle fell right on the weekend we were supposed to go to Seattle, so they worked with us to delay the start a little bit. It actually worked out well as my period was late in July.

I started birth control pills at the end of July and started doing Lupron shots (the turn off meds) about 2 weeks ago. Last Saturday (5 days ago) I started on the stimulation drugs. Yesterday was my first ultrasound and things are looking good. The goal this time is to have the eggs mature a little more slowly in the hopes of having some more mature eggs to work with. Last time we had 14 follicles, 10 eggs and 7 fertilized eggs before the arrested development debacle.

This time we are hoping for more follicles, more mature eggs, more fertilized eggs and embryos that want to grow into babies. We will be transferring the embryos at three days of development instead of the 5 days last time. This will hopefully allow the embryos to grow in a more accurate environment rather than a petrie dish.

Next week, I already had MOnday (Labor day) and Wednesday (my new normal day off) off, and had Thursday off as well just incase. BUT of course it looks like the extraction will likely be on Tuesday with transfer back on Friday. SOOOOOOO, no work for me next week.

I am collecting knitting projects to work on. I was able to go to the yarn store on Bainbridge Island while we were there this last weekend. I got a cute new book and yarn. I also ordered a digital piano - Yamaha with built in peddles and full keyboard. I have been wanting to play again and this will fit in my room without major cost or moving expense. Plus I can use the headphones to play without sharing all of my music with our new neighbors! I am sure they will appreciate this.

I am also looking forward to getting caught up on all of my errands.

We are also working on selling Tom's truck since we aren't really using it and trying to use mass transit and become a one care family.

Lots of activity.
Lots of action.

I will try to keep the posting coming more regularly again.
We are all hoping that things go better this time.


Oh, and I am doing acupuncture !! I really like the acupuncturist and although difficult to know if it is helping, at least it is a set aside time to relax and just clear my head.

He is worried about the possibility of his needles bruising me. I don't think he knows how much the one stimulation drug bruises and welts. His needles are nothing!!! He has encouraged me to be happy and relaxed to grow many mature and happy eggs. So I have been listening to more Disney music. Trying to do things that are relaxing and happy making. MOre time off and massages. We will see if this all works out and makes more happy embryos that want to grow. The acupuncturist thinks twins (one boy and one girl) would be nice and then we can be done....I wonder what meridian he needs to needle for that ;-)