Tonight I am sitting on my new bed in my new house with my new baby. A little over a year ago, I was at the beginning of this journey and hoping to be exactly here. It was an easy pregnancy, an easy delivery and so far Oliver is a pretty easy baby.
We are at the end of almost three months without income, will have a new mortgage to pay for come Sept 1, I not longer qualify for individual insurance because my history of fertility makes any future pregnancies more likely be to high risk, things are more dramatic at work than I would like for silly reasons and I just realized about two weeks ago that my true purpose in life is to be the best mom and wife I can just in time to go back to work and be farther from my son and husband than ever.
A person could become frustrated or overwhelmed or both in the midst of all of the chaos and new challenges.
And then I look at my baby lying on the bed next to me sleeping. I smell his head - clean and baby lotion-y. I see him smile and laugh. I see how happy my husband and I are when he is close by.
And I know.....
I can handle any hour commute to provide for my family for as long as I need to. I can afford to pay extra to get the insurance coverage I need while Tom and Oliver stay on the lower premium insurance. I can make it through tough financial times thanks to the good job and years of hard work I have already put in. I can rise above the drama at work and let cooler heads prevail. I can truly enjoy the new house and the new bed and be thankful. This is how I will be the best mom and wife I can be!
THIS WAS TOTALLY WORTH IT!
