We went in for induction as scheduled. This experience was totally different than how it had been before when we went in for the contractions a couple of weeks ago. They were waiting for us with a room all ready. They checked us in and it was almost like being checked into a fancy resort.
Once all of my vitals were taken and the IV placed, they gave me a "sleeper" (Ambien) and told me to try to get some rest. Tom had a large window seat that was both wide enough and long enough for his body and they had put out pillows and blankets for him.
We slept but not very much. The contractions started to get more intense although I had been contracting about every 3-4 minute when I came in, they calmed down a little bit once I got settled and relaxed but still was having contractions every 5-10 minutes. By 6 AM, I was ready for a dose of pain medication just to see if it helped. My cervix had changed to maybe 3-4 cm at that point. The Fentanyl they gave me for the pain was "nice" in the way that having about 4 beers placed in my IV would have been "nice" I felt no pain but also had a difficult time controlling my thoughts. And the baby monitor started to look a little "flat". No more please. Let's do the epidural, thank you!
By 730 AM I had my epidural and that was NICE!!!! NICE in the way that I felt no pain, no discomfort, and could SLEEP as I haven't slept in quite some time. They had to put in a bladder catheter and I was stuck in bed but sleeping for 4 hours was AWESOME!
By about noon, the contractions were picking up to the point where with each one I could feel pressure. Not pain, just pressure. Pressure is harder to control with epidural because it is a different set of nerves. At that point I was about 7-8 cm. About an hour later I was 9+ cm. Pressure increasing significantly over the next hour or so and I could still control pressure pain with breathing and humming "Blue Skies" while Tom squeezed my hand and patted my leg. About 3 PM I could not resist the urge to push any longer. About 315 PM they let me start pushing. They set up a mirror so I could see what I was doing.
This may seem like a weird thing but I have been on the other end of the delivery process for about 100 babies and I know what good pushing "looks" like. I just didn't know exactly what it felt like. With the mirror, I could make the two come together. By 4 PM, they were calling my OB to come running over and his head was well visible. I actually panted through one set of contractions to give my friend time to run across the parking lot from her office to be there in time to deliver Oliver. She saw me push one time and put on her clothes. Only a couple of pushes later and out he came.
His cord was wrapped once around his neck so they had to cut it before Tom could officially cut it. Then he was out. He cried softly and they placed him on my chest. After a minute, he wasn't really picking up his efforts to cry loudly and be strong and active despite the nurses and I stimulating him vigorously, so they took him to the incubator and worked to get him to wake up a little bit more. While my friend tried to piece back together the remains of my perineum, I sent Tom to the incubator to hold the hand of our new little one while he was getting his act together! One hand grabbed up to Tom and then the other and I'm pretty sure it was at that moment that my husband became a daddy! He admitted later that he just about melted right on the spot. Even talking about it later made us both tear up with happiness!
In due time, he was back with his mommy and I cannot describe in words what it is like to look into the eyes of your newborn child for the first time. Those who have done it know, those who have not can only imagine.
AND HIS NAME IS........Oliver Marshall Carr
And I don't think it would be humanly possible to love anything more than this.
He is training us how to be awake from about 2-5 each AM. I am trying to figure out how to shorten that time down. He sleeps most of the day but has at least two periods of eyes open to the world. Last night was the first night that we really slept well for any length of time. He slept in his car seat and that seems to have helped (reflux? tummy pain?)
He is eating a LOT! He is having good pees and poops and basically doing everything a normal baby should do! He is practically perfect in every way and I feel like singing songs when I look at him! Everything feels like it needs an exclamation point after it!
He listens to Beatles, NIck Drake, Shins, Decemberists, and many others on his dad's iPod playlist and loves to be close to the speakers and listen to his daddy sing the lyrics to the songs as he holds and rocks him.
Although being awake at 2-5 AM (and yesterday until almost 7) is not my favorite, I am doing well with the lack of sleep and last night's almost full 8 hours of sleep was AWESOME!
I look at him in the early morning when he is wide awake and not wanting to go back to sleep and we talk about what he will be when he grows up.
I hope that he will be a strong but kind man who, like his daddy, balances deep concern for other humans with a soft spoken manner and easy going spirit. But I also hope he has a passion for life to be the best he can be and set high goals for himself so he can feel successful and happy and in love with life however that happens for him and whatever he choses to do with it.
I hope he can learn as much as possible about himself and others. I hope he has a good sense of humor about himself and tries to not find fault with himself or others.
I hope he learns to have fun and to enjoy all the things there are for him in this world. I hope for his dad's sake he is passionate about music and sports - or at least one of the two! He has long fingers and toes that would be good for either of those things. Tom thinks he would be a good pitcher and if he happens to be left-handed all the better for a long MLB career ;-)
Today I took him to my office and weighed him and he is already above his birth weight!
Yesterday we went for a walk to Target and he had his first stroller ride!
He loves to spend time with family and friends already and is a good sleeper!
My favorite time is when he happens to smile - usually in his sleep and I look forward to the day when he can voluntarily smile and interact with us with his eyes well focused!
I AM SMITTEN! I AM IN LOVE! What a difference a year makes!
3 comments:
Congrats again, K! I'm thrilled for you and Tom, and I absolutely remember that feeling of being so in love with my baby when I met him for the first time. I still feel that way, in fact. It really is overwhelming, isn't it? And having been in your shoes, I know it's especially powerful after such a long journey to have him. Enjoy every amazing moment. The newborn period (sleep deprivation and all) doesn't last nearly long enough.
A big huge CONGRATS and a long-distance hug to the three of you. Oliver is SO stinkin' cute! Thanks for sharing the journey with us so far. I look forward to lots more Oliver updates and doting-mother stories. :)
This is such an amazing post, Kirsten, just bursting with your love for Oliver. A hundred congratulations to you, cousin! I am so happy for you and Tom.
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